Am I Ready For A Relationship? 23 Signs You Are And 13 Signs You Aren’t

One of the most puzzling things to do is telling if you are ready to enter a new relationship or not. Several questions start to pop up in your mind. It becomes even more difficult if you had to break up with your ex because they cheated on you. You keep asking yourself questions like:

Do I want this now?

Am I ready to be committed again?

If you can’t give clear answers to those questions, that’s a clear sign you are not emotionally ready. You see, the success of a relationship largely depends on the readiness of the partners to be committed.

Photo credit: Pexel.com — Photo credit: Pexels.com

You’ve got to check what’s on your mind about your past, present, and future. Even as a first-timer, checking your readiness would help you ward off lots of mishaps.

I have compiled quite a handful of signs that’d help you know if your bread is buttered or not. After reading this piece, you’ll be able to tell whether to enter a new relationship or not. Trust me, this is the most insightful article that exists on this subject matter. Happy reading!

To answer, “Am I Ready For A Relationship?”, Here are the 23 Signs You Are And 13 Signs You Aren’t

1. You longer think about your ex

Breakups cause tons of pain to the heart. And many times, it becomes tasking to let go of those beautiful memories.

Once you’re able to go a day or more without those thoughts of your holding you bound, you can take that as a sign that the dark cloud is now bright.

2. You’ve identified your faults

In life, we’re quick to point out other people’s faults. Ask anybody about why their last relationship went down the drain, most of what you’ll hear would be the misdeeds of their partners.

Look, there’s no “perfect” partner anywhere in the world. To maintain a healthy relationship, we must be ready to accept wrongs.

3. You’ve fully forgiven your ex

The need to let bygone be bygone after breakups cannot be overemphasized.

Don’t start another relationship so you can prove to your ex that you can live a happy life without them. It’s uncalled for. Your intentions should not be to get back at your former partner.

The moment these are settled, you can get back to the game.

4. When you become attracted to someone else

It’s been months since you parted ways with your partner, and after the rolls of guilt and pain, you suddenly find yourself picking in someone else. That’s pretty clear a sign that you’re emotionally ready to fall in love again.

5. You live a happy life as a single

You enjoy a good and happy life being single, yet you want to fall in love again?

If you have a yes, then you’re not looking for someone to roll your burdens to. That could be a sign you’re genuinely ready to give your heart to love.

6. You’ve learned to be independent

To some, being in a romantic relationship is a good way to have their needs met. Some levels of independence are required.

If your desire for a serious relationship is not inspired by your needs, that is a good sign that you’re emotionally ready.

7. You’ve finally figured out what your desire is

You shouldn’t be eager to start another relationship if you can’t get define what you want for your own life.

See, getting a new partner does not directly translate to happiness. Knowing what your desires are could help you quickly identify your “picture-perfect.”

If you’ve been able to define your life aspirations, there are chances you’re set to start another love race.

8. You are willing to be committed

Like I noted earlier, commitment is a must-have in relationships.

How ready are you to give your time? Are you willing to give your all into loving another person?

If you have a yes for both, then you are good to go.

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9. When you’re sure you won’t be transferring aggression

As humans, we are fond of transferring aggression to other people. Whatever was it that crumbled your previous relationship, it’ll be unfair to blame an innocent person for it.

Before falling in love again, you must be ready to leave the past behind. Don’t bring in the old baggage. You’ll find it more fascinating and fulfilling.

10. You love the person you are

Nothing sucks like having a partner whose life is up and scattered. In case you don’t know, it affects relationships in a big way.

It wouldn’t be wise to commit yourself to another person when your life isn’t the way you want it.

8. You are willing to accept the person’s differences

There are chances your wants won’t perfectly match your partner’s. You know, right?

If you desire a successful relationship, you must be willing to take your partner for whom they are.

11. You have the feeling things will work out

Usually, after suffering from several heartbreaks, you are liable to pick up strange opinions about life.

The moment you start having a rethink your one-time statements like – “I hate women” “Men are evil,” it may be a good time to start something new.

12. You’ve learned your lesson

We must be careful to learn our lessons, else, we’ll keep falling into the same ditch.

If you want to prove your relationship readiness, you should ask yourself if you’re ready to run with the vital lessons you picked from your previous experience.

13. When you suddenly want to date again

“I love you” sounds more like a cliché for a while after a breakup. Some would even swear never to go back into the dating world. It’s just an emotional reaction to the hurt.

After a while, thoughts of dating start to drop in your mind.

If that’s you, then, it might be a good time to try another relationship.

14. You’ve figured out some killer ways to please a partner

If your previous partners have always moved away, it might be intelligent to stay off being in love for a while. At least to gather relevant knowledge on how to keep a partner.

If you feel you have enough ideas already, you can go ahead and put them to work.

15. You long for affections beyond what you get from families and friends

Belonging to a loving family is wonderful, and so is having good friends too. However, their love may not necessarily suffice for your emotional needs.

If you’re experiencing that, it could be proof that you need a partner.

16. You always want to share your future plans with them

Do you find yourself eager to discuss your plans with them?

If yes, that could be a sign that you’ve finally found the right person.

17. You’re ready to welcome every change in attitude

If you’ve ever dated or married someone before, you should know there are chances your partner’s show of love could wane with time.

18. Your expectations are realistic

What features do you want your man or woman to have?

Are they realistic?

Your ability to keep your expectations realistic speaks volumes about your emotional readiness.

If you’ve always done that in your past relationships, know today that it is unhealthy.

19. You’ve taken your time to see if it is what you want

If what you are searching for is a long term relationship, then, it is safer that you take your time before making a decision.

You’ve done this and everything seems to be in shape? Go ahead and shoot your shot.

20. You’re financially stable

This is not to mean you should have everything in the world. However, you should have enough to handle your basic needs and even some surprise gifts for your partner once in a while. A relationship is more romantic when it is a give-and-take account.

21. You see beyond the physical

An average man would fall again and again for a woman with a good figure, pinky lips, and charming smile. Women have theirs also.

There is more to love life than what the eyes can see. If you recently started picking interest in other features out of reach to the sight, it’s a green light that you are ready.

22. You no longer feel unworthy

I’ve met several divorcees wallowing in self-pity because their “imperfections” crashed their marriages.

Though it might take a while to get over those ugly feelings, once you can lay hold on your self-esteem again, that might be a good time to start searching for love.

23. You’re ready for intimate communication

Several relationships have failed because there’s a breach of communication. Come what may, your partner should be your confidant.

If you want your relationship to work, you can’t afford to learn to communicate effectively with your partner.

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13 Signs You Are Not Ready for a relationship

1. You’ve not forgiven your ex

Have you moved on, or do you still intend on getting back at your last lover?

If yes, then, it’s not time. Truth is, you need a heart free of bitterness for a relationship to work.

2. Dating is not your priority

To be honest, if dating is not a priority to you, you are not ready

3. You’re still searching for a perfect partner

Do you keep pulling away from relationships because those partners do not meet your unreasonable requirements? If yes, then you are not ready for a relationship.

4. You feel unworthy

Are you still mourning your past failures? You’re emotionally unready to start loving again.

5. You’re not ready to share your time with someone else

If you try entering a serious relationship while you’re unwilling to spare out good time with your prospective man or woman, my sincere relationship advice for you is that you remain single.

6. You get freaked hearing your friends talk about dating

Getting pissed when you hear people talk about dating and family life is a clear sign that you are not emotionally ready.

7. You’ve not quitted being a player

If you’re stilled hooked on the habit of constantly searching for “fresh fishes” everywhere – on the street and dating sites, that’s a red flag that you’re not yet ready.

8. You think a new relationship is a means of survival

Relationships operate on give and take. You know, right? But if you still believe it’s a means to get rid of financial difficulties, you’re not ready.

9. You think starting a new relationship would make you feel complete

Falling in love again is not a quick fix to being complete. If you\re not complete as a single, you’ll not likely be in a relationship.

10. You don’t want an infringement on your privacy

You are not interested in sharing your privacy with a potential lover, you need to rethink. You’re far from being

11. You intend to reconcile with your ex

If you still want to get back to the game with your former boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife, entering a new romantic relationship would only make things more complicated.

12. You are not ready to be committed

There’s no point asking the question “Am I ready for a relationship when you’re not willing to be committed.” You’re not!

13. Other people are the ones pressuring you

A relationship is for two adults, so you shouldn’t let anyone – friends, families, colleagues push you into starting one.

Ways To Know You’re Ready To Date Again

Pat and Robert’s relationship was head over heels. As best friends in college, they did almost everything together.

After getting employed in separate companies after graduation, their intimacy started waning.

Eventually, Pat found out Robert was cheating on her with his co-worker, and she had to call it to quit.

It’s been five months since their relationship crumbled, and Pat still feels all men are shifty.

Now, Craig, her neighbor is trying all he can to get her attention. Though he sounds true, Pat still doubts her readiness to start dating again.

If you are in Pat’s shoes, here are 5 ways to tell whether you’re ready to date again or not.

You’ve gotten over the hurts/grief

You’ve learned your lessons

You don’t feel fulfilled being alone

You feel ready to put in efforts for the success of your next relationship

You’re now emotionally stable to start a new dating life

Stages of Love

Successful relationships evolve through five stages – affection, romance, passion, and commitment. Let’s briefly look at each.

The Affection Stage

Everything starts with picking interest in the person most likely because you’ve been paying attention to some finer details about them. In most cases, the signs are clear – physically and emotionally. The heartbeat rate could become faster than usual when you’re with the person, the palm could get sweaty.

The Romance Stage

At this stage, you have achieved a significant level of rapport with the person and you’re ready to further prove your intentions by spending time with your partner and buying them gifts.

But how do you tell what your partner is up to? Well, if your partner does the sincere romantic acts cheerfully, without any ado, the romance is sincere. However, if you notice your partner’s romantic acts are not primarily for your enjoyment, such a person is selfish.

The Passion Stage

The passion stage takes the romance between partners some miles further, that it becomes impossible for the two parties to deny. The bond is getting through to the roof. Here, the partners are already into one another all-wise.

The Intimacy Stage

At this stage, partners become best of friends. They discuss even private matters like their family concerns, aspirations, past lovers, and their feelings.

The Commitment Stage

The final stage is the commitment stage. Here, you’ve been through tolls of affections, romance, passion, and intimacy. Now, you’ve seen the goods and the bad of your partner and you’re fully ready to make your decision. You either break up stay committed.

Stages of Dating

Like love, dating has five distinct stages also. Here’s how they are related.

The Fantasy Stage

Every first date starts with the partners fantasizing about each other with a deep sense of attraction and romance. They call and exchange messages countess times every day. Because lovers are obsessed at this stage, all they get to notice is their partner’s bright sides and not their weaknesses.

The Reality Stage

At the reality stage, dating partners start to see each other’s flaws. And you know it’s human to get pissed off seeing your partner do the very things that irritate you. Doubts start to set in and you’ve got to decide whether to call it to quit or proceed to the next stage

The Exclusivity Stage

The exclusivity stage, also known as the committee stage is where the partners decide to stay committed despite each other’s imperfections and flaws. Here, they take out time to communicate more and make necessary adjustments.

The Intimacy Stage

At this stage, the partners have decided to be committed. They spend more time together and everything about their oneness is head over heels. Dating partners that make it to this stage are only a step away from getting engaged.

The Engagement Stage

Finally, we have the engagement stage. The two partners have been through the thick and thin, they’ve learned to cohabit, to forgive, and live a blissful life together. At this phase, they make plans for the future to live together as a picture-perfect couple.

Conclusion

It’s been a long road, we’ve talked about the signs showing whether you’re ready or not, the stages of love and dating. So do you think you’re ready? Your readiness is a major determinant of how successful your relationship would turn out to be. Let me know your thoughts in the comment section.